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孩子膽小懦弱皆因父母教育不當(dāng)所致 別不信！

出處：媽媽育兒網(wǎng)日期：2018-12-03 16:13:44編輯：白雪

說到孩子的教育問題，我覺得每一個(gè)父母都有自己不一樣的教育方法或經(jīng)歷。尤其是性格差異大的孩子，其教育 方式是完全不一樣的。比如，一個(gè)膽子大的孩子和一個(gè)膽子小的孩子在一起，我們首先要做的就是如何讓膽小的孩子膽子大起來(lái)，怎么讓膽大的孩子注意一下自己行為，少去欺負(fù)人家膽小的同學(xué)。

有些孩子是因?yàn)榧彝キh(huán)境而造成的膽小，但也有些孩子是天生就是怕生，膽小的性格。也許有些家長(zhǎng)會(huì)認(rèn)為，沒關(guān)系，反正娃還小，等長(zhǎng)大了就好了。也有些家長(zhǎng)認(rèn)為，寶寶出現(xiàn)這種情況，父母需要及時(shí)干預(yù)，以免越長(zhǎng)大越懦弱。造成寶寶膽小的原因有哪些？不同年齡階段，我們應(yīng)該如何引導(dǎo)？

@風(fēng)中飛揚(yáng)：孩子今年上一年級(jí)，班里面有一個(gè)南方小孩特別淘氣，其他孩子都不愛跟他玩，他總纏著咱家孩子，前天我老公去接孩子，孩子背書包時(shí)候不小心碰到那個(gè)孩子了，我兒子跟他說對(duì)不起了，他孩子居然說要找我兒子單挑，說必須得**。我老公回來(lái)跟我說了，說從來(lái)沒見過那么橫的孩子。昨天我去接我兒子，看見那孩子拿手指頭戳我兒子腦門，還舉著班牌滿操場(chǎng)追著我兒子，我跑上去用手往那個(gè)小孩胸口擋了一下，當(dāng)時(shí)那孩子那眼神老狠了看著我。后來(lái)讓班主任給喊回去了。聽班主任說，那個(gè)南方小孩上課到處找同學(xué)嘮嗑，我兒子就坐他后面，也總跟他說話。班主任說十一回來(lái)之后，得把他倆給分開。我老公和我采取的方法是讓我兒子遠(yuǎn)離他，不搭理他。如果他有動(dòng)手的情況，先找老師，然后必須告訴家長(zhǎng)。

@琪琪媽：我兒子就是那種打不還手罵不還口的孩子，開學(xué)第三天一個(gè)淘氣的小朋友往他頭上揚(yáng)砂石，問他他說自己不小心摔倒的，差不多問了第十遍他才敢說淘氣小朋友揚(yáng)的，我當(dāng)想的就是一定要找對(duì)方家長(zhǎng)說一下這樣情況，如果揚(yáng)到眼睛里可不是鬧著玩的，但冷靜下來(lái)和同學(xué)閑聊以后我改變了主意，家長(zhǎng)找老師是不明智的，老師本著多一事不如少一事的態(tài)度，孩子班級(jí)群里兩個(gè)家長(zhǎng)談?wù)撜l(shuí)被誰(shuí)欺負(fù)老師一直保持沉默，找家長(zhǎng)也是不明智的，被欺負(fù)和欺負(fù)人的家長(zhǎng)心態(tài)不一樣，再遇見不明事理的家長(zhǎng)解決不了問題反而會(huì)滋長(zhǎng)孩子的囂張，一個(gè)男同事說解決的辦法就是第一我不**了，第二不行我找老師，如果再有第三次我就打服你！其實(shí)孩子不受欺負(fù)的最好方法就是他自己有好朋友，有自己的小團(tuán)隊(duì)，而且老師一定要對(duì)你兒子好，這個(gè)就需要你和孩子共同努力了。現(xiàn)在我兒子有了自己的好朋友，老師對(duì)他也特別好，他不主動(dòng)和淘氣小朋友玩，一年級(jí)的第一個(gè)月也還算平安度過了。親如果有時(shí)間去看看孩子下課玩耍，就覺得這些都不是事了，我看見一個(gè)孩子拉著另外一個(gè)孩子兩個(gè)耳朵在操場(chǎng)瘋跑，如果你是家長(zhǎng)你心疼孩子么？但我看那兩個(gè)孩子樂的哈哈的，兒子班里有個(gè)小女孩無(wú)論下課放學(xué)都會(huì)給我兒子一個(gè)大熊抱，如果我是小女孩媽媽就一定會(huì)告訴不要這樣隨便抱男孩，但女孩媽媽在每次抱上時(shí)都會(huì)開懷大笑，家庭教育不同，該讓孩子獨(dú)立解決問題的時(shí)候了。從你的角度上別讓這些問題帶給孩子壓力，讓他開開心心的。

造成寶寶膽小的原因有哪些？面對(duì)膽小的孩子我們?cè)撊绾握_引導(dǎo)？

1、家長(zhǎng)平時(shí)過于嚴(yán)厲

有一些孩子膽小怕事并不是天生的性格，而是受家庭環(huán)境因素的影響才導(dǎo)致的。過于嚴(yán)厲的家庭就特別容易“打造”出膽小懦弱的孩子。我們不贊成過分驕縱，但過孩子也有權(quán)力去體驗(yàn)或感受生活的每一個(gè)細(xì)節(jié)。如果孩子每做一樣事情，父母都要求很苛刻，對(duì)于孩子來(lái)說難以完成。而此時(shí)父母還在一旁責(zé)罵甚至打罵，那孩子會(huì)因?yàn)槟愕男袨榕e動(dòng)而害怕，久而久之便成了一個(gè)別人眼中的‘膽小鬼’。要想讓這種孩子膽大起來(lái)，家長(zhǎng)除了要逐步放松自己的要求，也要多和孩子溝通，讓他有發(fā)表自己觀點(diǎn)或看法的權(quán)力。只有讓他感覺到平等了，膽子自然就大起來(lái)了。

2、家長(zhǎng)過分驕縱

過分驕縱的家長(zhǎng)，與前面過于嚴(yán)厲的家長(zhǎng)恰恰相反，他們什么都以孩子的想法為中心，一切都順從孩子的要求來(lái)完成。甚至為了讓孩子“省”去和其他孩子爭(zhēng)吵或其他不必要的麻煩，本該由孩子完成的一切事物，家長(zhǎng)都“包辦”。比如，當(dāng)孩子課間與同學(xué)有點(diǎn)小摩擦?xí)r，恰巧對(duì)方的態(tài)度比較強(qiáng)勢(shì)，是那種得理不我饒人的孩子。這時(shí)，家長(zhǎng)為了減少孩子“被欺負(fù)”而出面調(diào)解，幫孩子解決本該自己解決的問題。孩子完全沒有因機(jī)會(huì)去處理本該自己處理的問題，碰到難題就有家長(zhǎng)來(lái)“包辦”。試問，在這種家庭長(zhǎng)大的孩子，他膽能大起來(lái)嗎？對(duì)于這種孩子，要家長(zhǎng)要做的就是適當(dāng)?shù)姆趴v一下孩子，告訴孩子自己的事情自己做。當(dāng)他體驗(yàn)到了“成功”的快感，以后遇到困難時(shí)，就自然能膽大的想辦法去解決了。

3、限制孩子的社交圈

正常的社交不但能鍛煉孩子的情商、為人處事的方法。對(duì)于膽小怕事、不敢出門的乖乖仔來(lái)說，也是鍛煉膽子的一種方式。如果家長(zhǎng)一直限制孩子“自由活動(dòng)”，那么孩子永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)知道，在家以外的這個(gè)社會(huì)上，究竟是好人多還是壞人多，遇到困難的時(shí)候是該如何解決、碰到壞人應(yīng)該如何尋找?guī)椭?。想要孩子變得膽子大的話孩子的圈子是很重要的，家長(zhǎng)們應(yīng)該多讓孩子與同齡孩子溝通交往，這樣的話可以有效改變孩子膽子小的情況。

4、天生就是膽子小

這一種孩子是天生下來(lái)就膽子小的那種，這部分孩子可能是因?yàn)閶寢屧趹言衅陂g受到嚴(yán)重的驚嚇，或者其他原因讓他很沒有安全感，從而導(dǎo)致孩子先天性膽子小、怕事。對(duì)于這種膽小的孩子來(lái)說，最好的解決辦法就是正確的引導(dǎo)致，讓他慢慢地體會(huì)到生活當(dāng)中，其實(shí)沒有那么多危險(xiǎn)。增加了安全感，膽子自然也就會(huì)大起來(lái)了。

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